Pet of the Month

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Pet of the Month2018-01-25T14:02:11-05:00

December 2022 Pet of the Month

Name: Pete

Breed: Domestic Short Hair

Likes: Although he is getting on in years, Pete, aged 13, remains active at home with a wide array of hobbies and interests. These include, but are not limited to, trying to set the Guinness World Record for the longest nap, 3 AM calisthenics, birdwatching, and curating his collection of approximately 2,583 toys. In addition, he owns and operates a small, home-based biscuit making business.

Why are you [insert literally any activity] when you could be giving me treats right now?

Dislikes: Veterinary visits. As a result, he has become active in his community. Due to a series of longstanding disagreements with his doctor (about, for example, whether veterinary care constitutes a form of torture under the Geneva Convention), Pete has petitioned Congress several times over the last few years to pass a law making the practice of veterinary medicine a felony throughout the United States. Even though he has been unsuccessful to date, Pete remains undeterred. He is hopeful that being honored as Pet of the Month will provide some momentum for his campaign.

About Pete: Pete, a native Washingtonian, had a rough start in life: he was born homeless and without a human personal assistant. About 11 years ago, he identified a potentially suitable candidate as the human was carrying groceries from his car into his home. Pete approached the human on the sidewalk with a series of food-related demands, and the human happily obliged. The two have been inseparable ever since. Pete prides himself on his tough-but-fair management style; he will, for example, often generously provide his assistant with an additional 3.6 seconds of sleep in the morning before alerting the human, usually by way of a paw to the face, that it is time for breakfast. Needless to say, Pete runs a tight ship.

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