Meet Sunshine!
Name: Sunshine
Breed: Denebian Viper Cat
Likes: Belly rubs (my favorite), back rubs (my favorite), face rubs (my favorite), head rubs (my favorite), neck rubs (my favorite). Pretty much any rubs. Getting brushed and brushed and brushed (ooh, my favorite). Riding in fast cars and big trucks (damn, my favorite). Good tucker (oy! my favorite). Manipulating humans, (of course). Eating any animal that trespasses on my land. Banging my dry food bowl against the solarium floor, kinda like James Cagney in those prison movies. LAZZRR BEEMS! (MY FAVORITE.) Mowing the lawn like a tiny orange cow. Laying on laps and chests (favorite). Girl’s chests preferred (really my favorite). Oh! and a bit O’ the ‘nip, don’t you know.
Dislikes: Lap ejection. Short rations. Humans that move when I’m sleeping on or against them. That fat grey cat next door. Crows. Deep snow (see picture). Rain. The vet.
About Sunshine: I had to steal a march to sneak into the Green Beret’s home. By serious collusion with Kathy Meyer, I was able to stealthily insinuate my way into the castle. The reality has become a sort of durance vile mild. Even though I am treated as a god, things have played out draining me of my catness and leaving me in the lap of luxury. Day 983 of my captivity. My captor continues to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects and bright lights. He dines lavishly on fresh meat and I am fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectlyclear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust him, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at his feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into his heart, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, he merely made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am. Soon, the worm will turn….